Paid Companions for the Elderly: They're great, but why do we need them in BC?

My mom with Alice, a nurse and "paid companion" who has become a close family friend

I've just returned from a visit to see my Dad and family in Pennsylvania, and was once again touched and impressed by the care and affection of Dad's "paid companion" Mary. Although Dad is now in extended care, with a good staff to patient ratio, Mary provides the added personal attention and stimulation that makes Dad's life so much fuller each day. My brother and his wife also live nearby, and are there almost daily too, and are caring and attentive and do so much for Dad, and his other "kids" visit often, but we as a family have long ago realized the added dimension that private caregivers contribute, and also how lucky we are that Dad has been able to pay for this care, first for Mom (who passed away 4 years ago) and now for himself.

And yet, I can't help but worry about the increase in the numbers of paid companions over the last 20 years here in British Columbia, where we used to have far more home support services offered through our government health care system, but where now the aides and nurses are almost overwhelmed much of the time simply doing the necessities, with little time to sit and chat and have a personal interlude with any of their clients.
As I researched this topic with the help of Linda Outcalt, a project manager and research assistant at  the Centre on Aging at the University of Victoria, who wrote her master's thesis on paid companions and their elderly clients in BC, I realized that the reason for the huge increase in this job category in BC is because of the cutbacks to community care services which used to include many of the functions now being filled by privately paid companions, or caregivers. In other words, thanks to government cutbacks and a philosophy of "do it yourself...whether you can afford to or not" that is part of our political climate, the reality now is that those who can afford private care will pay for it and get better care, and those who can't, well....they just have to do without.

And yet, according to Linda, backed up by research done at the Centre on Aging, it is actually cheaper for the government to cover these community care costs and avoid institutionalization of the elderly than it is to offload the costs to the elderly and their families and make them pick up the tab for private care. If this is accurate, and I believe it is, then why does our government carry on with these cutbacks instead of the win win of reinstituting and even expanding community care and/or additional caregivers for our growing elderly population? Scandinavian countries do this very well, it seems. And the current vogue is to encourage people to "age in place"....which means, at this point, take on your own costs at home if you can. I'd like to see more publicity of this topic and more stats and a societal attitude in keeping with our Canadian belief in socialized medicine and health care for all.

March is the month to "embrace" aging..is that possible?

So, "embrace aging" you say? If you're like me, you think that idea may be just a bit over the top....I mean, I'm working on trying to gracefully accept aging, never mind embrace it! But, since the alternative isn't great either, I suppose the idea makes sense...at least, the Victoria Eldercare Foundation thinks so, and they are sponsoring a wide array of free workshops all during the month of March, where you can explore everything from how to avoid scam artists to how to write your obituary (a writing exercise that is often used in journalism classes, by the way, to get you thinking about what's important....to do now!). You can also learn about how to get shoes properly fitted, or be introduced to Tai Chi, or even find out how to get the most of our your next doctor's appointment! To register for these free sessions or find out more, go to the Eldercare Foundation website or call them at 250-370-5664.

Legal Matters Matter

At a certain point in a NYNOs life, it's a good idea to take a look at your legal affairs....okay, so when did you last do a will?  Do you even have a will?
We finally did this, at the urging of our financial consultant, and now we can feel quite smug that we've done the basics, and all is well.
If you are so inclined, a bit of advice: Expect the will and accompanying documents you'll need (i.e. Power of Attorney and Representation Agreement, if you live in British Columbia) to cost you around $1,000, for a couple to have these things done.
Make sure you choose to assign your Power of Attorney to a person you trust, and further, make sure it's an enduring Power of Attorney, that is, goes on after your death or if you become incapable of making decisions. Next, our unique Representation Agreement (think of it as a POA for medical and personal health care matters, or even a living will) is important to have in place...BC is the only place on earth that has them....and think about an Advance Medical Directive that your doctor keeps in his/her office, and that spells out your precise instructions to your doctor about what to do in medical crises if you can't make decisions then. It's very worth it to take the time (and spend the money) to get these documents, at least, in place....then you'll be sure that you, and not the courts, are in charge of deciding who might make decisions on your behalf when you can no longer do so. Your will only applies after your death, but the POA and Representation Agreement may kick in when you are alive, but no longer capable of decision making. Get these in place for peace of mind! For more on this, take a listen to my March 8, 2012 column (Legal Matters Matter) at  my CBC url page.

Fashion Funk after 40

My NYNO column this week was a lot of fun....asking a cross section of women in Victoria, BC where they shopped for funky, yet age appropriate clothing, for the 40 and up woman. Never had so many responses so fast!

What I'm asking is, where do you shop for the fun stuff that you love to wear but that doesn't make you look like a mutton dressed up as a lamb! And the responses poured in.

I learned about a line of clothing, Canadian-made, called Sympli, that is growing in popularity, and found out a lot of Victoria women are discriminating consignment store shoppers. And also love a wide variety of other stores and boutiques in our West Coast creative, casual town. To hear the full list go to my CBC url, and click on the Fashion Funk Feb. 23, 2012 column.

The Silver Skier

So, how are all those older, or should we say, mature, more experienced skiers faring these days on our BC mountains? As the number of senior and almost-senior skiers increases, turns out the ski hills of BC are taking note and responding!
I think some of us have worried that by the time we get there, all the deals for seniors will be long gone, but at the moment, the opposite seems to be happening...not only are Age 65 (or sometimes even age 75) discount rates for ski passes skill in effect, but more perks are being added as mountains cater to the growing numbers of older skiers. Good news!

You can hear more of the details by clicking onto my Feb. 16, 2012 CBC NYNO column on The Silver Skier (which is, or will be, posted very soon), but in the meantime a few fun facts:
*A man at Whistler/Blackcomb is still racing at age 86
*The oldest ski instructor at Whistler is 85!
*You can ski FREE at Mt. Washington at age 75 and up.
*More than 300 people are members of the Whistler Senior Ski Team.
*At Sun Peaks, more than 100 are members of the Sun Peaks Antiques!
*Big White and Silver Star have a new Club 65, with several perks, for the senior skier.

*Shaped skis are much easier on the knees and have extended people's ski life, as have more groomed slopes, more comfy boots, and lifts that slow down for onloading and offloading....All these things of course are great for other skiers as well. Happy Skiing!

Making Metchosin Age-Friendly

The rural community of Metchosin, BC that I live in is engaged in a process...(one that I talk about more in my Feb. 9 NYNO column for All Points West on CBC Radio One in Victoria.) It's a grassroots-driven attempt to really look at the community, get feedback from seniors and "seniors-in-waiting" through workshops and discussion, and come up with a list of top ten (or 20, or 30) priorities for making Metchosin more age-friendly, a  place where residents can truly age in place and in community. I attended some of the workshops and found the discussions stimulating, the people (many of whom I didn't know) engaging and honest, and the process very satisfying....being a small part in a community initiative that felt truly worthwhile.
So, what came out of this so far? A report to council, that summarizes the findings and suggests directions to move in....the most urgent of which seem to be around Communication and Transportation improvements.
Taking a closer look at possible Housing options is another priority, a way to help make it possible for residents to age in place when they can't "run the farm" anymore. 
There are a variety of options to study, including perhaps some form of senior-friendly cottages that share a common area.
The idea of an information hub, or data centre that seniors can access by computer or call to talk to someone (hopefully a "seniors' advocate") on the phone, a central depot for all sorts of pertinent info...everything from who to call to get your roof fixed to how to access home care, or where to take the bus,... was overwhelmingly endorsed, and Metchosin has just received a grant to work further on this "one stop shop" idea for seniors.
Looking at more transportation options, like expanding the existing volunteer drivers' program in the community, or using the municipal van for outings for elders, is another hot topic.

The project is only really getting going now, and it's a long road, but I'm proud of the fact that the process is underway and people of good will are taking the time and making the effort to make Metchosin a community where people of all ages can continue to live vibrant, useful, engaged lives, to "live in community," with the active support of that community, for as long as they choose.

Under the same roof...and loving it

 

View of Lokhorst common living room and patio

Here's a creative idea for intergenerational living....an "estate" house or mansion (an older home in Saanich, BC with a large addition that includes two in-law suites, plus a common living and dining area, and elevator.) The Lokhorst family lives here: David and Kathy and their 3 teenagers, plus BOTH, yes, both, sets of grandparents, each in their own lovely new suite, which the grandparents were able to design themselves.

It's a living arrangement motivated by David and Kathy's (the "sandwich generation") desire to be there to help out their parents as they age and may need more assistance, plus by the desire to see more of each other. At the same time, everyone has their own private space and independent lives. 

View from living room of in-law suite

It might not work for everyone (you've got to all get along, for one thing), but this is one family that is committed to being there for each other, in good times and bad. And in today's society of expensive housing, and long lived elders who may need help or care eventually, it's an approach that is worth thinking about. You can hear more about my visit to the Lokhorst's home, with CBC's Jo-Ann Roberts, at All Points West. Scroll down and see the Not Young, Not Old column on the Lokhorst "mansion." And thank you to the Lokhorsts for sharing their home and lives with us! It was a treat.

Large common living room

Lokhorst "estate" house



Three generations, one roof